Oh the joy of sex! In this case Wanderlust opens up the space to talk about all those taboo subjects and in the context of a middle aged couple what’s more. Joy, pillar of the community and couples therapist!
My goodness this makes for super interesting viewing, not least of all because in working as a couples therapist dealing with desire in long term relationships is a common theme. The dichotomy between security and desire are constant but reluctant bed fellows. The reality is that with security and contentment sexual desire can often wane. Long gone are the heady days of mystery and intrigue. Libido is tied to the unknown. How does a couple find that when we can practically finish our partners sentences!
In Wonderlust we are suddenly seeing a couples therapist who now needs others in order to fulfil herself. I am sure that many will start including this into their own repertoire in order to bring excitement and thrill into a long comfortable relationship.
So, the million dollar question is “is this an option?”
There are as many types of relationships as there are people. What two consenting adults do is entirely up to them. I do however say this with a “buyer beware” note attached. Adding other partners is fraught with difficulties. There are some who are able to have open relationships. However, very often there aren’t clear expectations and someone is hurt, particularly, if they come from a monogamous relationship where there are pretty clear emotional and physical boundaries.
So how does one spice up a long term relationship without completely throwing out the rule book? Connection, connection connection. Long term relationships can experience a renaissance in flagging libidos by using connection to explore uncharted territories together. Bringing in other partners is a quick fix to having excitement but, if it goes wrong, the price is high.
If you want to take charge of your relationship and want to rediscover your relationship you can contact The Relationship Practice where a group of highly trained specialists can provide support.
Written by Pam Custers
Twitter: @Pamcusters
